A Funny Story

Stop me if you've heard this one... there's this guy Joe, and his wife gets pregnant, but he hasn't been "visiting the breadbasket" if you catch my drift. So he asks his wife about this and she gives him this cockamamy story that no one could possibly believe, figuring it's better than nothin'. But Joe actually BUYS IT when she says god came down and like implanted in her a seed that would bear his son. So, the funny part is like when the kid is actually born-- Joe's goin' on like, "You are the son of god, and must" blah blah blah, while Mary (that's Joe's wife, though they somtimes called her Madonna cause she looked like the singer) is saying stuff like, "Jesus (that's the kid's name, Jesus) I don't believe this". So, anyway, the kids havin' this great time thinkin' he's the son of god-- layin' hands on whores, playing with lepers, the whole bit. Of course, kid like that gets in a lot of trouble. Like once, he offered to save this whore if she'd save him like $20, if you know what I mean. Turns out it wasn't a whore and she kicked him in the nads. Pretty nasty, actually-- they had to cut him open and, back in those days, they didn't have anesthesia or nothin'. So anyways, they get this rock to replace one of his nads which has gone south since the old lady kicked it. After they sew him all up, Jesus is like really excited about the whole thing-- he goes around tellin' everybody about his surgery and his "New Testicle". So, by this time, everyone else is also agreein' that Jesus is the son of god, partly cause he knew some really good magic tricks, but mostly cause it meant he wasn't THEIR son-- let's just say Mary got around enough that even SHE wasn't sure exactly who put the bun in her oven. So, anyway, Jesus's goin' around, braggin' about his New Testicle and how's he's layin' his hands all over the place makin' people feel better, and people is writin' this down like it's gospel or somethin'.


Last modified stardate: 20070609.123537

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